Magical Monster Repellant

Holy fuck shit. When I went to retrieve the morning paper from the driveway today a crazy headline flashed before my eyes.

http://www.triblocal.com/Highland_Park_-_Highwood/List_View/view.html?type=stories&action=detail&sub_id=172444

"Highland Park mom helps Fairytale Wishes come true for kids."

So, I opened it up and started reading. This loony mother is marketing a "monster repellent" for kids who have irrational fears of monsters.

Yeah, yeah. I know. It's a stage and eventually the kids out grow it. But fearing non-existent monsters is an irrational fear, nonetheless.

Referring to her son who was afraid that monsters were hiding in his room she says, "it just makes sense that monsters are terrified of bubblegum, so I put that story behind it and he bought it, hook, line and sinker."

Holy shit. Bubblegum??? This woman is bragging (and promoting) the fact that she was able to lie to her son and he believed her tales. She is in her 30's and her son was all of 4 when she began creating these fictitious stories to ease his fears. Duh. Of course a full grown human could manipulate a little child. Should we be lying to our children from the beginning?

The article mentions that some of the varieties of the monster sprays include a Super Hero Spray flavored with Peppermint for courage and a Happy Camper Spray which has a grape smell.

"Each bottle comes with a mini-fairytale told by the Magic Fairyale Wishes Frog, Freddy, who explains why each particular scent will help the child overcome his or her fear."

This woman is telling her son that these magical potions are a cure for his normal childhood anxieties. Instead of just explaining to her son that there are no such monsters and giving him a night light, she chose to fabricate more creative stories. At 4, her son does not need to be confused about general cause and effect.

She is teaching him that having a special potion and magically spraying it around him, will protect him. This cannot be a helpful idea to be teaching our children.

They may grow up and actually believe that there are magical words or acts that one can say or do to alleviate fears. Shit, that's what praying and religious ritual is all about.

And these fucking monster repellent stories come from WHO? Of course, Freddy the Magic Fairytale Wishes Frog. His job is to explain what each bottle of crap actually does and he makes up back stories for each ailment and it's cure.

Of course little Humans (children) believe this garbage. Their parents are believers of their own fairytale stories. The Torah, New Testament, Koran, Bhagavad Gita, Veda all claim to hold answers and cures to humanities ailments. Who cares that they are lies, right?

Just like the idea of Santa Claus; these so-called innocuous stories primes these children for magical thinking from the get-go. I think that this does a disservice to our children because it teaches them that there are magical fairytale things to start with.

My biggest gripe is that these full grown adults KNOW that they are deliberately lying to their children. And making money from it. Humph.